Xcrement-23

Y’know, I was having a perfectly good afternoon today reading some comic books until I came across an article in The Wizard that was discussing Wolverine’s sister. Yes, you heard me correctly, HIS SISTER! As odd as that may sound it’s actually an intriguing character concept except for when you read the parts about how she’s a former prostitute at 15 years old, has claws that can extend from her feet as well as from her hands, and was part of a similar Weapon X program that grafted the adamantium to her claws, but not the rest of her skeleton because her bones were still growing. She’s his “genetic” sister, because she was spawned from a DNA sample of Wolverine which also gives her his healing factor ability and is somewhat feral due to her limited human contact to date.

Are you still there?!

This has got to be the biggest sh*t-cake from Marvel yet. Certainly I understand that a) female characters with badass powers are considered kool and b) the demographic appeal is mainly for teenage boys, but lord have mercy, a frigging 15-year-old hooker!? *UGH* And what makes it even worse is the lame attempt to add “instant koolness” by making her “related” to Wolverine AND having her be a part of a bootleg Weapon X program. In the end, all this does is serve to undermine how cool Wolverine actually is by watering down his character mythos with the introduction of this little twit named “X-23″, ’cause like, ooohh its so kool we don’t know her name yet, she’s a mysterious badass chick with super sharp hangnails from her feet…Oooo, that’s so frigging brillant Joe Quesada & Co., excuse me as I choke a mule on it’s own vomit. Ten dollars says a Michael Jordan fanboy persuaded the attendees of this circle-jerk character-concept session to use the number 23 in the name….or maybe they’re setting us up for 22 other ass-crumbs of bad ideas.

Is it any wonder why I have high blood pressure after walking out of the comic book store these days!?

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